How many times in life have you heard this... Ephesians 4:29 says to let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouth. If you grew up in church or Christian School like I did, this was a verse that was brought to my attention often. As you can guess it wasn't a verse everyone heard a lot, for instance I never remember anyone ever having to tell sweet little Elizabeth Cross, the mild mannered and kind person she was that she needed to watch her mouth. As for ole' Justin on the other hand this was a staple in the "verses thrown my way to get me to behave" category. I, believe it or not, am somewhat known for having a mouth, I can remember many times in my life from school to now having to apologize to a friend for something I said. My issue was I wanted to be funny, I was a short skinny kid with a big head and not much self confidence. I went to school and church in the same building and my life was pretty much in a fishbowl. I overcome my insecurity about who I was and my place in the world by developing a quick and sharp tongue.
Anyways back to Ephesians 4:29, I always heard the unwholesome talk part but I never really remember as a young man anyone telling me the second half of this verse which I feel holds just as strong an instruction as the first half. In it's entirety it says, "Don't let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth BUT only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs so that it may benefit those who listen". WOW!!!! this is so much more than watching your mouth, to me it is basically saying that it is not just choosing your words to keep from unwholesome talk, it says that every word from our mouth should be beneficial to ALL who hear it. It should build up according to peoples needs, so it is not just about choosing your words carefully to keep them clean, it is about saying words that have power and ability to help those who hear it.
When reading this verse I had this strange question pop in my head, It was "What kind of old man am I going to be"? Because we have all met the two extremes of senior citizens, first is angry old guy... he is the guy who once ran a buggy into my heel at Kroger and told me to "Move It Numb%^$#... (hey it's a family blog, plus considering the context of the subject). He speaks his mind freely and with a shot of vinegar in his words, he calls 'em like he sees 'em... he just sees 'em in a very cynical matter. Then there is the sweet old man, he is full of encouragement and wisdom, through his years he has tempered every part of his life including his tongue so whether times are good or sour his words and actions still encourage those around him. His words are measured and well thought out, when he speaks, he says something... these are the greatest people on the planet... we all love this sweet natured and gentle man. Even in moments when his words may not suit us or we disagree, we can trust his intentions and know his words come not from spite but from love and experience. I realize that at 30 years old I am already deciding which old man I want to be, the buggy guy at Kroger at 30 didn't say "Hey I want to be the kind of senior who give nice young men really deep heel bruises at Kroger". I think changing my verbal habits at this stage in life gives me a much better chance of being more Ben Matlock than Archie Bunker!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Crossview, Cupcakes, Converse and Crushed Cynicism
Dear Lord;
Please help me to overcome my preconceived notions of who you are and how you work.
A pretty pathetic prayer when you consider it is coming from a guy who has been following Christ for a long time and even worked at a church for a long while... yet if I am being completely honest about where I am right now this prayer reflects directly the flaw in my thought process. I had decided for God how and when he worked, I had also decided how this new church thing was going to work. This isn't the first time I have come to this realization, it is just as I continue on my journey with more experience and intelligence grows new arrogance.
God says "Step Down from your position at Cross Walk"
I say, "You got it God... after this summer!"
God then makes a way for the church to find a new person (doing a great job I hear BTW) and I am gone by February.
God says, "It is time for you guys to find a new church"
I say, "Awesome God, I know just what we will do... I will take the first few months to visit all the churches around town, make notes and compare them than make an educated decision based on my awesome system (I even made sheets to rate our experience).
God says via Rachel and Lily Sunday after our first visit, " Let's come back here next week, I really really liked it!, (well Lily was just excited about cupcakes and new toys)".
So here we sit quite possibly one and done after one week! We went to Crossview in Rockmart and absolutely LOVED it. This was Rachel's first choice, I was cynical for reasons that will be discussed later but man did God really blow me away. I did try even in my cynicism to come with an open mind and willingness to be honest about the experience but deep down knew I would leave saying "I knew it wasn't for us". Instead I was challenged to my very core by this guy about my age in a plaid shirt (everyone wears plaid shirts) and converse. The Holy Spirit was very evident in that refurbished gymnasium and I was convicted not only by the message but by revealing an arrogance in me concerning the methods of God.
I had become such an "expert" of "church stuff" or so I thought, I sat in my church environment and made grand judgements (not out loud so much) on what was going on in the churches surrounding me. " Oh yeah that church, they are all about numbers" I would think. "As long as they look cool and draw people they don't care." Or I would think, "That church is ran like a corporation, they could care less as long as they meet the bottom line". I also looked at churches with young pastors, contemporary music and a certain style and would scoff " What a bunch of hipsters... Jesus isn't hip! What will they do when they are no longer hip?" I sat in there too lazy and judgemental to actually find out what these others were actually doing.
So back to Sunday as I met the pastor I noticed the converse, the hair and jeans, I thought well this will be interesting... Praise God I didn't allow that thought to close my mind. Because shortly after that I remember a conversation I had with an older member concerning a youth wearing a hat in the building at CWC, he wanted the kid to take it off, the kids hair looked terrible and he would rather have left. I challenged this man on why it truly mattered, and actually succeeded in allowing the student to keep his hat(and in his mind his dignity). Suddenly I felt this hypocrisy come over me standing in the atrium of this church. What right do I have to judge this guy because he isn''t dressing up. I am basically doing the same thing that drove me crazy concerning adults and their treatment of youth over the past ten years. That guy prays to God in his pajamas, so why would God be offended by him presenting God's word in his natural attire, so I had to ask myself, "What gives me the right to be offended or even care about how he looks." In service it didn't take long to get past the look of the man because the holy spirit was hitting me left and right in there I left that sanctuary a changed man not only by the message relating to my duties as a husband (that was the sermon) but a much smaller and humbled follower of Jesus.
Preconceived Notions are dead, God is not exclusive to the simple thoughts of simple people. His ways are SO big and broad that he can overlook the narrow views of the church to reach out to many using many different kinds of means. The Lord is truly amazing and I thank him for continually growing me and changing me!
No question this week.
Please help me to overcome my preconceived notions of who you are and how you work.
A pretty pathetic prayer when you consider it is coming from a guy who has been following Christ for a long time and even worked at a church for a long while... yet if I am being completely honest about where I am right now this prayer reflects directly the flaw in my thought process. I had decided for God how and when he worked, I had also decided how this new church thing was going to work. This isn't the first time I have come to this realization, it is just as I continue on my journey with more experience and intelligence grows new arrogance.
God says "Step Down from your position at Cross Walk"
I say, "You got it God... after this summer!"
God then makes a way for the church to find a new person (doing a great job I hear BTW) and I am gone by February.
God says, "It is time for you guys to find a new church"
I say, "Awesome God, I know just what we will do... I will take the first few months to visit all the churches around town, make notes and compare them than make an educated decision based on my awesome system (I even made sheets to rate our experience).
God says via Rachel and Lily Sunday after our first visit, " Let's come back here next week, I really really liked it!, (well Lily was just excited about cupcakes and new toys)".
So here we sit quite possibly one and done after one week! We went to Crossview in Rockmart and absolutely LOVED it. This was Rachel's first choice, I was cynical for reasons that will be discussed later but man did God really blow me away. I did try even in my cynicism to come with an open mind and willingness to be honest about the experience but deep down knew I would leave saying "I knew it wasn't for us". Instead I was challenged to my very core by this guy about my age in a plaid shirt (everyone wears plaid shirts) and converse. The Holy Spirit was very evident in that refurbished gymnasium and I was convicted not only by the message but by revealing an arrogance in me concerning the methods of God.
I had become such an "expert" of "church stuff" or so I thought, I sat in my church environment and made grand judgements (not out loud so much) on what was going on in the churches surrounding me. " Oh yeah that church, they are all about numbers" I would think. "As long as they look cool and draw people they don't care." Or I would think, "That church is ran like a corporation, they could care less as long as they meet the bottom line". I also looked at churches with young pastors, contemporary music and a certain style and would scoff " What a bunch of hipsters... Jesus isn't hip! What will they do when they are no longer hip?" I sat in there too lazy and judgemental to actually find out what these others were actually doing.
So back to Sunday as I met the pastor I noticed the converse, the hair and jeans, I thought well this will be interesting... Praise God I didn't allow that thought to close my mind. Because shortly after that I remember a conversation I had with an older member concerning a youth wearing a hat in the building at CWC, he wanted the kid to take it off, the kids hair looked terrible and he would rather have left. I challenged this man on why it truly mattered, and actually succeeded in allowing the student to keep his hat(and in his mind his dignity). Suddenly I felt this hypocrisy come over me standing in the atrium of this church. What right do I have to judge this guy because he isn''t dressing up. I am basically doing the same thing that drove me crazy concerning adults and their treatment of youth over the past ten years. That guy prays to God in his pajamas, so why would God be offended by him presenting God's word in his natural attire, so I had to ask myself, "What gives me the right to be offended or even care about how he looks." In service it didn't take long to get past the look of the man because the holy spirit was hitting me left and right in there I left that sanctuary a changed man not only by the message relating to my duties as a husband (that was the sermon) but a much smaller and humbled follower of Jesus.
Preconceived Notions are dead, God is not exclusive to the simple thoughts of simple people. His ways are SO big and broad that he can overlook the narrow views of the church to reach out to many using many different kinds of means. The Lord is truly amazing and I thank him for continually growing me and changing me!
No question this week.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Intrawebs, David Tomlin, Grannies, Lies, Roman Catholics.and Oh Yeah... Beattitudes!
So I am exited next Sunday we visit our first church, it has been narrowed down to three but I am still researching and checking them out on the intraweb. I as though in a lot of ways I am standing on the edge of something big... I don't know what it is or what it will mean for me personally but just the thought of the possibilities are awesome. Much of me is tired of anticipation and ready to get down to it, so next weeks blog should be very interesting!
On to my question last week, I ask you to put those specific 5 areas (not the only 5) in order of importance to you specifically, they were Denomination, Fellowship, Message, Music and Tots. The responses were pretty well what I expected. Based on who you were and what was going in in your life is how it broke down. Mom's placed importance on tots, students on fellowship, some said message, everyone was middle ground on music.
Basically I opened that Pandora's Box to back a trend I see in the American Church, I believe that (some) churches that want to see results in the way of large crowds can often use these areas of "Church" to draw people. A church hires youth pastors and children pastors so kids will be excited, so in turn their parents will be excited and attend regularly. They bring on big time worship leaders, spend thousands upon thousands of dollars to make "worship" cutting edge and rocking. Pastors tell made up stories from pulpits placing their names and personal information in to cause a reaction from the body whether it is laughter or tears. Finally (here we go) people who don't know half of their denominational beliefs tow a line of denominational loyalty completely ignorant of not only what others believe but what they believe as well... Granny was a Methodist so I'm a Methodist (stayed away from the SBC this time).
Let me start my feelings on these 5 issues by stating that all 5 have a place in the church. Giving kids something to do and teaching them the basics is beneficial, We need preachers who can convey the message of the Gospel and lead believers to deeper walks with conviction and care. Fellowship with other when done correctly is strengthening and a beautiful help in our walk with Christ. I know I have a history which includes periods where I non-denomed (and I may again) but I see the purpose and value of denominations... I really do. And music, well to me you need music, i don't know about placing so much importance on relevance to the point you spend so much money... but to each his own. In other words, there is no bad part of the 5 choices.
To me in the end it all comes back to the gospel, it all comes down to discipleship and the role the church plays in that. It is about worship, not with guitars and large speakers playing the hippest David Tomlin song out there but rather worship from the humble heart of those who truly love and adore God. It is about being a shoulder for someone who is overwhelmed, a dollar for someone who is broke. It is about being CHRISTIANS, the beatitudes alive and walking today. Too often though the church (organizations) misdirects the attention of it's people by drawing our attention on insignificant things such as affiliation, style, flash and religious traditions that bear no resemblance to anything in God's Word. It is time the church (the people) rise beyond the consumer driven church programming of the day, to stop looking for where you can be entertained and find where you can be used. It is like that Roman Catholic JFK once said ask not yada yada yada (you know it). Instead we should be asking not what God can do for me through the church but what I can do for God in all areas of my life (including church). This is my focus and goal moving forward as we find our new place... I want to challenge you to as well!
Next question for you guys.
Who was your biggest influence on your spiritual life as a kid? (0-18)
Who was your biggest influence on your spiritual life as an adult? (18-present)
Explain who they were aka. Sunday school teacher, pastor, youth guy, parent, grandparent...
On to my question last week, I ask you to put those specific 5 areas (not the only 5) in order of importance to you specifically, they were Denomination, Fellowship, Message, Music and Tots. The responses were pretty well what I expected. Based on who you were and what was going in in your life is how it broke down. Mom's placed importance on tots, students on fellowship, some said message, everyone was middle ground on music.
Basically I opened that Pandora's Box to back a trend I see in the American Church, I believe that (some) churches that want to see results in the way of large crowds can often use these areas of "Church" to draw people. A church hires youth pastors and children pastors so kids will be excited, so in turn their parents will be excited and attend regularly. They bring on big time worship leaders, spend thousands upon thousands of dollars to make "worship" cutting edge and rocking. Pastors tell made up stories from pulpits placing their names and personal information in to cause a reaction from the body whether it is laughter or tears. Finally (here we go) people who don't know half of their denominational beliefs tow a line of denominational loyalty completely ignorant of not only what others believe but what they believe as well... Granny was a Methodist so I'm a Methodist (stayed away from the SBC this time).
Let me start my feelings on these 5 issues by stating that all 5 have a place in the church. Giving kids something to do and teaching them the basics is beneficial, We need preachers who can convey the message of the Gospel and lead believers to deeper walks with conviction and care. Fellowship with other when done correctly is strengthening and a beautiful help in our walk with Christ. I know I have a history which includes periods where I non-denomed (and I may again) but I see the purpose and value of denominations... I really do. And music, well to me you need music, i don't know about placing so much importance on relevance to the point you spend so much money... but to each his own. In other words, there is no bad part of the 5 choices.
To me in the end it all comes back to the gospel, it all comes down to discipleship and the role the church plays in that. It is about worship, not with guitars and large speakers playing the hippest David Tomlin song out there but rather worship from the humble heart of those who truly love and adore God. It is about being a shoulder for someone who is overwhelmed, a dollar for someone who is broke. It is about being CHRISTIANS, the beatitudes alive and walking today. Too often though the church (organizations) misdirects the attention of it's people by drawing our attention on insignificant things such as affiliation, style, flash and religious traditions that bear no resemblance to anything in God's Word. It is time the church (the people) rise beyond the consumer driven church programming of the day, to stop looking for where you can be entertained and find where you can be used. It is like that Roman Catholic JFK once said ask not yada yada yada (you know it). Instead we should be asking not what God can do for me through the church but what I can do for God in all areas of my life (including church). This is my focus and goal moving forward as we find our new place... I want to challenge you to as well!
Next question for you guys.
Who was your biggest influence on your spiritual life as a kid? (0-18)
Who was your biggest influence on your spiritual life as an adult? (18-present)
Explain who they were aka. Sunday school teacher, pastor, youth guy, parent, grandparent...
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
The Call Me The Wanderer....
Well we made it through, Last week was our final week of youth ministry at Cross Walk Chapel. Wednesday night the kids were really awesome,,, I never counted but there was ALOT of folks upstairs to show their love and support to our family, It was a great time. Then Sunday morning we finished off our last Sunday Morning at Cross Walk which was strange and surreal. Since I have explained to the board of the church our intentions I see no wrong in telling you all that we are going to visit new churches.
So this is a new and exciting time for me, my church experience has been pretty routine. I started going to Praise when I was 3, went there until I was 17 when I began attending New Canaan. At New Canaan began working in Student ministry, At 20 took a Middle School Pastor Job at Trinity Fellowship, stayed heir until 2002 when I went back home to Praise where I stayed until 2005 when I went to Cross Walk. Although while it looks like a lot of moves, going from one church to another due to new opportunities as a minister is quite different from just finding a new church. For instance we didn't shop around, one Sunday i am getting a goodbye from one group then the next Sunday I am being welcomed to a new one. It is just a different kind of experience.
So now I hope you kind of understand why we are excited at the opportunity to visit around, not excited so much to leave one but excited at the possibilities involved with all the others. If you have had negative experiences looking for a church PLEASE do not respond and tell me how horrible your experience was. I am sure there will be certain down sides to this transitional time but we choose to focus on only the great possibilities right now, so don't be a Debbie Downer. Also a few people have hinted at us visiting their church... and while we appreciate the offers and may just come visit to spend a Sunday with friends, we are actually looking for a church in Dallas, Villa Rica or Rockmart. We want to get closer to home but if you go to a church around there let us know!
Okay so today I wanted to really pose my first question to you, my loyal followers, This question is to just get an idea of how you feel about the subject, not to create a great debate on the comment page. I will not respond to questions basically just because the question will be the subject of a future Blog.
Brewer's Question of the Week
Place in order from 1 to 5 (1 most important, 5 least important) the personal importance of these specific parts of a church experience( I know there are more, let's just focus here for now). If you would like to explain why that would be great...if you just want to list'em you can do that as well.
Your choices in no specific order:
Fellowship (Sunday school, small groups, events (although i am aware there is more than fellowship in these things... you get the idea))
Music (Style, Skill)
Message (Pastors presentation of the word, style, personal growth or conviction through preached word )
Denominational Ties (government and system of beliefs)
The Tots (children's, youth, nursery)
So this is a new and exciting time for me, my church experience has been pretty routine. I started going to Praise when I was 3, went there until I was 17 when I began attending New Canaan. At New Canaan began working in Student ministry, At 20 took a Middle School Pastor Job at Trinity Fellowship, stayed heir until 2002 when I went back home to Praise where I stayed until 2005 when I went to Cross Walk. Although while it looks like a lot of moves, going from one church to another due to new opportunities as a minister is quite different from just finding a new church. For instance we didn't shop around, one Sunday i am getting a goodbye from one group then the next Sunday I am being welcomed to a new one. It is just a different kind of experience.
So now I hope you kind of understand why we are excited at the opportunity to visit around, not excited so much to leave one but excited at the possibilities involved with all the others. If you have had negative experiences looking for a church PLEASE do not respond and tell me how horrible your experience was. I am sure there will be certain down sides to this transitional time but we choose to focus on only the great possibilities right now, so don't be a Debbie Downer. Also a few people have hinted at us visiting their church... and while we appreciate the offers and may just come visit to spend a Sunday with friends, we are actually looking for a church in Dallas, Villa Rica or Rockmart. We want to get closer to home but if you go to a church around there let us know!
Okay so today I wanted to really pose my first question to you, my loyal followers, This question is to just get an idea of how you feel about the subject, not to create a great debate on the comment page. I will not respond to questions basically just because the question will be the subject of a future Blog.
Brewer's Question of the Week
Place in order from 1 to 5 (1 most important, 5 least important) the personal importance of these specific parts of a church experience( I know there are more, let's just focus here for now). If you would like to explain why that would be great...if you just want to list'em you can do that as well.
Your choices in no specific order:
Fellowship (Sunday school, small groups, events (although i am aware there is more than fellowship in these things... you get the idea))
Music (Style, Skill)
Message (Pastors presentation of the word, style, personal growth or conviction through preached word )
Denominational Ties (government and system of beliefs)
The Tots (children's, youth, nursery)
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